Chapter 14 ~ Sweet-Toothed?

The teacher's hoarse voice and the scraping of chalk on the blackboard reverberate in the hushed classroom. I mechanically copy the classical lit writing into my notebook.

In the corner of my notebook-filled vision, outside the window, the verdant, glittering young leaves of the cherry trees^[1] flutter in a fresh May breeze.

Ren invades my thoughts in the space between the scenery and my schoolwork. I feel it's one of the main reasons I didn't ask Tomoka-chan for advice about her this morning. It's incredibly hard to talk to someone about how she's been acting lately, like climbing into my lap or wanting me to feed her. Compared to before, the distance between us has drastically shortened. Her speech and attitude are as cold as always, so the inconsistency really bothers me.

That's not a bad thing, of course. For example, I'm happy we can eat together, watch TV, and share a space like we used to. And I was really overjoyed when she thanked me.

But, at the same time, it's true that when I recall things like my quick heartbeats when touching Ren's skin, or her baffling behavior sometimes, make question marks start appearing again.

It's just like I'm a girl falling in love in some novel. I laugh at the simile that popped into my head. As if I'd fall for my little sister.

The bell rings while I'm thinking this over. I rush to copy down the notes I left behind then stand and bow as the day duty officer commands.

With that, lunchtime arrives and the classroom's mood instantly relaxes. Taking advantage of that, Tomoka-chan approaches.

"I'm sooo tired. Classical lit's seriously soporific~"

"Since the teacher's voice is so gentle."

"So right! I think they could seriously take the world by storm if they release a sleep-inducing ASMR."

"What the heck?"

We get ready for lunch while chatting idly. I say 'get ready,' but we're both eating bread, so we just take it out of our bags and wipe our hands.

Tomoka-chan isn't that interested in her lunch. I can't say I'm picky about mine, either. I once made Ren a bento right when she started high school, but she flatly refused it. We've been eating convenience store pastries and bread ever since.

I realize I'm thinking about Ren again. Rather, she's always been in my head, but certain recent events simply might have made me aware of it. After all, I've gotten even closer with Tomoka-chan by asking for advice about her.

As I'm pondering this, the classroom door opens with an awfully loud rattle. The classroom fills with chatter.

"Isn't that girl from the basketball club?"

"So tall and cool~"

I reflexively look toward the door and see Ren, her form materializing from my thoughts.

"Hey, isn't that your sister?" Tomoka-chan speaks up.

Ren quietly watches the classroom.

I rise and rush over to her, feeling everyone's eyes on me.

"What's wrong, Ren?"

Her stiff expression seems to soften a little upon seeing me.

"I want to eat together," she says like it's nothing. Just that makes my heart pound. It's probably because of her injury, but I'm happy Ren came to me like she used to, wanting to spend time together.

"Got it. Wait a sec, okay?" I say, then turn and rush back to Tomoka-chan.

"Um, Ren says she wants to eat lunch together."

"Ohh, that's big progress! Good for you. Now, run along then."

"Huh? Tomoka-chan?"

"No no, after so long, it'd be tasteless of me to intrude on your sisters' bonding time. Don't worry about me, go ahead."

"Understood."

"Also, I suggest the rooftop if you're eating outside. The first-years start getting bored of it this time of year, so there shouldn't be anyone up there," Tomoka-chan says with a wink. It's somehow comical, even though it looks natural on her.

I show her a smile and press my hands together. "Thanks. See you later, then."

"Have fun!" Tomoka-chan says with a fluttering wave. She then exchanges some look with the waiting Ren, whose head is peering our way from behind the door. Ren bows slightly.

The classroom shakes with commotion as I draw everyone's attention. I leave their gazes behind as I start walking alongside Ren, aiming for the roof.

The blue sky stretches over the concrete-gray rooftop. One way or another, the two of us had that view all to ourselves. As Tomoka-chan said, there's no one here but us. This close to the latter half of May, maybe the reason why was the weak sunlight getting stronger. We happily settled into the shade near the entrance.

"Feed me today, too."

Not a request anymore, but a command. It wouldn't be strange to view her cold-hearted expression and quiet tone as arrogant, yet I only found it endearing. How wicked my genetic programming as an older sister was. If my little sister wanted something, I wanted to grant it, no matter what it was.

"No worries," I nod, smiling.

Ren's already moving before my reply, taking pastries out of the plastic bag she'd brought. A pack of four doughnuts, often seen at the supermarket. She then takes out a carton of strawberry milk from the school's vending machine and places it at her feet.

Skirts, doughnuts, and a milk carton were strewn randomly on the concrete.

"Okay."

Ren hands over the doughnut bag as if it was the norm, urging me to feed her.

I wondered for a moment if she couldn't just eat a doughnut with her uninjured left hand, but I so was happy to spend time with her that I turned away from the question.

I tear off the wrapper and pick an orange-colored doughnut, its sugary coating glimmering. I think it must be really sweet as I hand it to Ren.

Bending toward me, she opens wide and bites into it. Despite how big she is, she takes a small bite. She chews, still leaning diagonally toward me.

"Good?"

She nods while chewing.

"You love sweet things, don't you, Ren?"

She shakes her head, denying it as much as she can. Maybe the thought of having a sweet tooth is too embarrassing. Her mouth's still full, however, so she doesn't say anything.

She's certainly taking a long time to swallow the heavy doughnut. I take out my own yakisoba-pan in the meantime and take a bite. Ren glares as if admonishing me.

"Focus on me," she says, bumping her shoulder into mine like a capricious cat. I stumble a bit from the impact. Ren then puts an arm around my shoulders. My heart leaps by reflex.

"Thanks," I say, my face heating up. I realize Ren's the reason I stumbled.

"Don't mention it," Ren nods nonchalantly, her arm still around my shoulders. It couldn't be called anything but shameless. She seemed innocent and selfish today, way more than she was as a child, as hard as it is to believe.

She's been acting strange in general lately, not just today. Her cold tone of voice and curt demeanor remain unchanged, but her words, actions, and emotional distance are all over the place. Sometimes too close, others even closer.

However, part of me wants to turn a blind eye to whatever caused this change, to simply enjoy it for what it was. I wouldn't feel lonely if I was near her.

I twist in place as I pick up another doughnut, but I'm pretty restrained. Ren's so close that our skirts overlap.

"Umm, it's hard to move."

"Don't wanna. And no more doughnuts. Strawberry milk."

An immediate rejection. I have no idea why but she doesn't seem to like the idea of us separating. And now she's changing her mind about what she wants.

"Yes, yes."

I put the straw in the milk carton and hold it out. Ren rests her head on my shoulder and takes a sip.

I laugh at the surreal sight. 'Surreal' is the only word I have to describe this sense of closeness, this bafflement, and everything else crammed together. Laughter is my only response, pretending not to see this for what it actually was.

The two of us, alone on the rooftop, our skirts not fluttering despite the wind.